I am a Burry.

What?

I am one of over ten thousand people following the tweets of @strawburry17. I, like many of the other Burries, also watch her YouTube channels. And what’s more, I found myself recently in a live video and chat session with her and about 100 other fans.

It’s Got Me Thinking About Popularity.

I began to grasp the idea of popularity sometime during my middle school years. I remember in particular an incident that must have occurred during fifth grade. A new girl was put in my class whom I hoped to befriend, but it turned out that she never gave me the time of day. She was immediately taken in by the others who never gave me the time of day. The cool kids.

In junior high, I remember a moment of clarity when I realized why I felt un-liked by my teachers. Teachers loved me in elementary school because I was quiet and I never caused trouble. As I got older, I realized that this was making me unnoticeable. A nobody. The teachers began to relate to the students as little adults, and they were drawn to the popular kids, just as other kids were drawn to their popular, charismatic peers.

What Does it Take?

What makes one person popular, and the other unnoticeable? I’ve already mentioned what I believe to be one of the biggest factors: charisma. Here’s what Wikipedia says about charisma:

Charisma (Greek "kharisma," meaning "gift," "of/from/favored by God/the divine") is a trait found in persons whose personalities are characterized by a personal charm and magnetism (attractiveness), along with innate and powerfully sophisticated abilities of interpersonal communication and persuasion. One who is charismatic is said to be capable of using their personal being, rather than just speech or logic alone, to interface with other human beings in a personal and direct manner, and effectively communicate an argument or concept to them.

That’s not the only requirement, of course. You and I probably both know people who are charismatic but not particularly popular. Good looks and money can take you quite a ways. Being in up on current trends will put you in the “in crowd.” Plain old confidence can carry one a long way in and of itself. I think it’s a combination of factors, and sometimes just chance, that puts people in the popular category.

Where I Stand

Well, first of all, I still enjoy being a Burry. Though I may be unnoticeable to Meghan, I find something attractive in her personality, and I think she makes great videos. The problem is, as much as she wants to relate to people, she can’t be friends with everyone, and some people are going to feel slighted. And it only makes sense! Over ten thousand people may mention her in a given day, and she has to wade through all those tweets and decide which deserve her attention. I don’t feel slighted by her any more than I feel slighted by not being given personal attention from Mandy Moore (another popular person I follow on Twitter).

Second of all, I’m going to keep being me.

I was never popular in school, and I didn’t really want to be popular; I wanted to be liked. I’m realizing now that they’re the same thing. Do I really want to be popular, though? Would I be, if I could snap my fingers and make it happen? I might, but I’m not really sure. Do I want to have thousands of casual relationships? Would that make it easier to find people with whom I could be close, or would it just make it harder, since there would be so many interactions to choose between?

I still have that desire to be liked, though. I want my words, art, videos, tweets, and personality to be liked by others.

Not necessarily by everyone.

At least by my friends.

Do you have any thoughts? How important is popularity to you?

One parting observation: Being casual friends with a popular person is almost indistinguishable from being a fan.